Hardest Part

I love being an introvert, I’m a proud introvert, it is who I am and I’m perfectly good with it but the hardest part about it for me is that I’m a friendly introvert. You might ask why this is hard. It’s hard because I always feel bad when I’m not in the mood to talk to people. I feel like I’m letting that person down or that they will think that I’m not a friendly person.

There are many times that I enjoy talking with people, like my coworkers. I’m used to them and feel comfortable around them that I pretty much talk to them all day, we have discussion about everything, we never just have small talk. But when we get customers in the store and we’re practically strangers, it’s all small talk. The conversation starts out fine but then nothing substantial is said and the talk just fizzles out. Then it’s awkward. Do I bring up something stupid to keep the conversation going? Or do I go back to work and ignore the customer? They are sitting right in front of me, we are face to face so it’s a tough call to make.

I feel completely awkward in these situations and can never decide what to do so I just sit there and work and if they start talking again I will join in because I do not want them to awkward, I want them to feel at ease here, even though I don’t. They usually continue to talk because I give them no indication that I do not want to. Most people will continue to talk to me because I give off this friendliness aura. I can’t stand rude people so I tried never to be rude or come off as being rude. So people feel free to talk to me for as long as I stay and listen.

Another example are repair technicians that come out to your house to fix or replace stuff. It’s already bad enough that I had to allow a complete stranger in the house and I know that most of them are just regular nice guys but being an introvert and having a stranger in your house is a horrifying experience. Our water heater had just died and we were hoping to just get it fixed but it needed to be replaced. My husband went online and found a local company that had good reviews on their website and scheduled a technician to come out. The guy was really nice and super professional but he was a “Chatty Kathy” and I am just glad that my husband was there to talk to him because I probably would have hidden in our bedroom the entire time.

Thanks everyone for stopping by, I hope to see you again



I love to read, you could almost say that I am addicted to reading. I have a book with me everywhere I go. I am never without one. I read so much that my husband thinks it’s ridiculous how much I read, he only thinks that because reading makes him sleepy, after like two pages he can hardly keep his eyelids open. He listens to books on tape, I could do that too but I love the feel of a book in my hands, that’s why I have never gotten a tablet and stored my books on it. I never will.

I am a pretty fast reader, I go through like three books a week. I used to buy them at the bookstore, paperbacks were my thing because they were cheaper than the hard covers but with how much I read, I was blowing through money like crazy. So I started searching out book fairs, you can get a book for one dollar at those. Amazing. I would go a couple days in a row and buy like fifty or sixty books in all and hoped that they would last me until the next book fair. They are not that common. After awhile my books would run out and I would find myself back at the bookstore. Finally, I realized that I did not to keep buying books, I rarely read them a second time, I only did when the book blew me away, so I got a library card and now I just check them out and return them when I am done. The library is probably one of the greatest things that our world has created. Free books, whenever you want them, what could be better? I’ll tell you, if my local library does not have a book in their stock that I would like to read, then I will go online to my account and request that particular book and put it on hold. They will actually go get it from another library for me and I can pick it up from them when it comes in. That’s how it can get better!

Like I said earlier, I am probably addicted to books, I’m OK with that. You just never know when you’ll have an opportunity to read a couple of paragraphs, pages or chapters so I carry a book with me at all times. Life is unpredictable, so in one of the most unlikely of places an opportunity may arise where I could get in some reading, I would be totally devastated if I didn’t have a book with me. Even if I didn’t get a chance to read, just knowing that I have my book with me helps soothes my mind. It is far better to have a book and not have an opportunity to read than to have an opportunity to read and not have a book. I guess the point that I am trying to make here is that, why interact with other people when you could just read a book?

Thanks for listening, hope you find your way back!



Private Time

I don’t feel that many people respect other people’s private time, this could be because I am a introvert but still I think that people want to talk to you they don’t really care what you’re doing they are going to disturb you no matter what. I know that being an introvert I need a lot more private time than others so I try to let it slide whenever I can and not get upset when others encroach on my time, however I do feel that if I am in certain places, like for instance the bathroom, nothing is that important that you need to talk to me when I am in there, unless there is a major emergency, which is going to be very unlikely.

Just to give you an example, I work in a collision shop, my shop is located inside of a car dealership. We are two different companies, my collision shop rents the body shop area from the dealership. We do the body work on their cars in the lot when they need us to and they also recommend their customers to us for work, we get most of our parts for our cars through them, this particular family who owns this dealership owns multiple dealerships, they pretty much have a dealership for every make of car, so we get our parts through them and in return they give us work but we are two different companies. I am the only girl that works in my body shop, the other six employees are men. This is fine, they totally respect me and never make anything awkward.

We do not have our own bathroom in our shop, the guys can just use the locker room bathroom that the dealership has for their technicians, this bathroom is pretty much in between our shop and theirs. I have to use the bathroom that is in the front show room. It is on the other side of the building from our shop and the women who work at the dealership along with all their customers use this bathroom, our customers use this bathroom as well. This is fine, I do not mind walking all that way, it gets me out of sitting all day. What I do mind is having conversations with women I barely know in there. I talk to the women that work in the dealership office because that is where I get my mail and where I go to talk to the lady who works in the accounts department. They are all nice but I don’t feel that we need to chit chat while we are both peeing. Let’s do our business then we’ll chat.

Side story; There was one point where the women’s bathroom was under construction which meant we all had to share a co-ed community bathroom.  These were the worst two weeks of bathroom situation that I have ever dealt with.  It seemed like on a daily basis that the there was a clogged toilet.  I guess it makes sense since there were twice as many people using them but you would think that a commercial building like ours would be capable of handling a large number of people but I guess not.  Rant over…..

I go up to the office every day in the afternoon to check to see if we have any mail up there. The mail gets delivered to them in the morning but I will always wait until the afternoon to get it because they are busy, they have their work to do, so I give them time to sort out my mail. I do this every day in the afternoon, I have never not done this. The other day I go up there to use the bathroom, it is mid morning, I am the only one in the bathroom, awesome. I sit down and do my thing, a lady who works in the office opens the bathroom door, peaks her head in and says to me “You got mail up here”, at first I don’t say anything, I am shocked that this has just happened, then I recover and realize she is waiting for my response so I quickly say “OK”. She walks out.

Was that really necessary? Couldn’t she have waited until I got out to say that?  Was the mail just really too important that day to wait until the afternoon? Or am I just really introverted?

thanks for being here, hope you come back!


Talking to stangers

I can’t explain why I do not like talking to people that I do not know. It may have to do with the fact that since I do not know them then we will have nothing to talk about, except maybe like the weather or maybe it could be Monday and we both hate Monday’s. But why even bother if that is going to be the extent of our conversation? If I can’t talk to you about your life or my life, if we are just going to comment on how cold it is or that the weekend is just not long enough, what’s the point?

My husband would say that people need community and kindness and when strangers talk to each other it’s because they need to feel that they are not alone in the world. So I’m the rude one who doesn’t want to talk? I can see his point and I understand the need to feel like you are not alone. The other day for instance, I know that I am not alone, I just really, really like being around no one. I know that I have my husband, my parents, my brother and his family and of course the few friends that have stuck by me through thick and thin. I just don’t have that need to be around people to feel alive. I feel alive on my own. It is the only time that I can truly be myself without having to worry about the things that I say, because let me be honest here, some of the things that come out of my mouth sounded a lot better in my head. My husband is literally the only person in this world that I can be around all day everyday and not have a need to be away from him.

If I am going to let myself open up to someone then I want that to be meaningful, I do not want to waste my time or the other persons time with just idle words. We are going to have a conversation, it doesn’t have to be a deep, soul seeking conversation but a conversation that is going to last more than a few words and we will definitely learn something about each other when it’s over. Those of my kind of conversations, ones that both people will get something out of. I cannot tell you have many times that I have been stuck in a conversation with someone that has not listened to a word I have said, they were only waiting for me to get done talking just so they could get in the next thing that they wanted to say. Or with some people I could never get in a word because they talk so much that the story they are talking about has a sub story, then that sub story has a sub story and so on, I have talked to many people that do that. When I figure out that the person I’m talking to does one of these things, then I just stop trying, there is really no point.

Thanks everyone for being here, and a special thanks to the guys over at Waterford Sealcoat for being my first actual advertiser. Check out their Yelp sealcoating Waterford page. I hope you find your way back.


I am not shy

Most people when first meeting me think I am a quiet and shy. Little do they realize that I am just trying to figure out in my head if I am going to let them in my life. I’m trying to figure out if they are worthy of my time and energy, I’m not trying to be rude here but I cherish my time and energy and very few people make the cut of who gets a piece of it. I don’t make many friendships that you would call just an acquaintance, the  friends that I have are few but our friendship is deep and unconditional.

The people that know me well have a hard time believing that I am an introvert when they are with me because I feel comfortable showing these people the real me and I am a very happy, outgoing and friendly person. They only remember that I am when they haven’t seen me in months because I have probably reverted to hermit mode because there was too much social interaction for me and I needed to recharge. I can only handle so much before I need to be alone in my home where I can relax and just chill out.


It may surprise some of you that I am married to an extrovert, this makes for a very interesting marriage. One that is filled with debates about going out and how often we should. It’s a never ending discussion with us about who we should go out to dinner with, I say why not just the two of us, his response is that it’s always just the two of us, then I say not always. Again and again. It never gets to a point where we have shouting matches where we don’t talk for a couple days, we are always polite. He does get frustrated when he feels that he is making me go out, he says that there are times that he thinks I am only going along because I feel that I have to not that I want to. To a point that is true, there are times that I do want to go out and be social, the only problem is that those times do not come along very often so then when I do go out it’s as if I feel that this is what I should be doing.

To me there is nothing better than cancelled plans. Whenever I make a decision to go out I instantly regret it, then I will have some anxiety the days before the plans are set for but when I am there and even afterwards I have fun but then say in my head that I am not going out again. Sometimes I will plan to do nothing and if someone asks me to do something on that day that I planned to do nothing I get all bent out of shape that my day is now ruined because I would feel like an ass if I said no I can’t hang out because I have plans but I also don’t really want to hang out either and I know that I will not enjoy that lunch date or shopping time because I would rather have been doing nothing.

Well, I hope you all could relate a little to what I wrote about, hope that you all come back and read some more!

Thanks, Grace